but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
