So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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