we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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