Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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