i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
