How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
In other news, I just burned my penis
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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