What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
