Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
