We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize