he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
