SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
