So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize