high people should be assigned attendants
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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