You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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