she kept yelling 'call me bella'
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
and she was petting her beer can
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
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