Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You can't just leave with hair like that
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
