i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
