My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
