even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
