dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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