why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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