Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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