Where is the hickey?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
