Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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