the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
well, you know. whores of a feather.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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