I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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