This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
