Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize