Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
