just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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