Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
