yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
