I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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