I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
