i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
