? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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