You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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