I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
