It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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