He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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