What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
