Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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