you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
