Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize