he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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