He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
