His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Randomize