Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize