it hurts more in the daytime
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Randomize