She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
