a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
